BOGOF Carmichael!!! Clegg abandons Scots Tories – say he will not play if SNP supports Labour.

1024px-Nick_Clegg_Bournemouth_rally

Clegg abandons Scottish Liberal Democrats to their fate. Cares only for the anti-Scottish vote in England.

BBC reports, “Liberal Democrat leader Nick Clegg has said he would not join a coalition dependent on “life support” from the SNP after the general election.

Mr Clegg told the Financial Times he “totally” ruled out “any arrangements” with Nicola Sturgeon’s party in the event of a hung Parliament.

Grassroots activists in the burrow today woke to the news that Nick Clegg will not support a Labour Government if the SNP is in any way involved. So no matter what the Scottish people say, Clegg will foist aTory Government on us, even if they are reduced to one seat in Scotland as the opinion polls currently indicate – and yes, that lucky winner could be our very own Alistair BOGOF Carmichael. Vote LibDem and get a Tory government for free, no matter what the Scottish people say. He might even get to keep his job as Secretary for State even though 58 out of the 59 Scottish constituencies don’t want his party.

The Hogboon, an old LibDem came around to the burrow with his head in his hands.

“They have abandoned us. Mr Clegg has deserted Scotland and only cares about English votes. He has given up. He knows that the only LibeDem left in Scotland may be Carmichael ” he wailed. “The only party left for him to support will be the Conservatives and they are as popular in Scotland as the Trow’s farts. If I vote for dear Alistair, I will get the Cameron but Alistair e is such a lovely man and he has done so much for the constituency.”

“Euuuch,” said Little Svein. “Trows’ farts are really horrible. What exactly has Mr. Carmichael done for Orkney and Shetland?”

There was a long silence as we all tried to think of something.

“The farmers won’t vote Liberal Democrat now,” continued the Hogboon to break sillence, “not if they have any sense. We all know that the Tories want a referendum on the EU and the English press want us out. So do UKIP. If we leave the European Union the farmers are finished. What can we do?”

Being a wise rodent, I determined not to rub it in. I have always thought that Alistair Carmichael is the bargain vote. Vote for him and get a Tory for free. I kept my mouth shut.

“Well,” Mrs. Vole said bravely, “we know that the SNP is committed to staying in the European Union and so is the Labour Party too. You could vote for one of them.”

“Yes,” I replied, “but remember that Labour stands no chance in Orkney and Shetland. The SNP might just pull it off.”

photo credit David Spenderoriginally posted to Flickr as Nick Clegg addresses the Conference Rally

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s